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2 weeks ago // 667,505 notes

apatheticghost:

nearly every family on disney channel

  • goofy dumb parent(s)
  • naive older brother who is nice but a total idiot and is often the butt of the joke
  • sister who is the main character and thought of as the only sane member of the character and also has very good grades but may be a bit uptight
  • younger sibling who is an evil mastermind and always has some sort of scheme to profit off something

2 weeks ago // 147,782 notes

2 weeks ago // 175,691 notes

beachier:

me: *dials 911*

operator: hello 911, what’s your emergency?

me: i need someone to cuddle with, rub my back, and play with my hair

operator: someone is on their way, please stay calm

2 weeks ago // 181,844 notes

howidiotic:

if i do not see josh peck interviewed by oprah before i die i will not have lived a full life

2 weeks ago // 403,034 notes

3 weeks ago // 85,859 notes

theirs:

jegusgogfuckass:

did you kno that 10 million pounds of maple syrup was stolen from quebec

10 million pounds

1/3 of the government’s reserve

like. how do you even steal 10 million pounds of maple syrup. where do you hide it. what would you even do with it

why does the canadian government have a maple syrup reserve 

(Source: officialplanetmars)

1 month ago // 136,657 notes

  • me: dad can I-
  • dad: ask your mother.

1 month ago // 31,310 notes

  • me: mom can I-
  • mom: ask your father.

1 month ago // 24,501 notes

"If you look at the fact that you have a roof over your head, food to eat, that you are young and beautiful and live in a peaceful land, then no, you have nothing to be sad about. But the fact is, we are not only a physical body, we have souls too, and sometimes our souls get sick. If you break a leg you don’t just say ‘I have no reason to have a broken leg’ and ignore it; you seek help. It’s the same when your soul gets hurt. Don’t apologize for being sad."
My doctor when I told her I had no reason to be sad  (via uglypnis)

(Source: hrive-ithiliel)

1 month ago // 234,285 notes

dysphorism:

DO YOU EVER JUST

GET JEALOUS SO EASILY

LIKE NO 

THAT PERSON IS MINE

DON’T BREATHE AROUND THEM PLEASE AND THANK YOU

1 month ago // 702,010 notes